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Does anyone feel less sexy after birth of child?

When I became pregnant almost 3 year ago I was 120 pounds. When I gave birth I weight 180. Now 3 years later I am 160. Through those 3 years I been 145, 150, and slowly gone up. I tried workout videos, personal trainers, going to the gym or working out at home. Its been very difficult and stressful. I don't feel sexy and lack sex drive. My husband likes slim women. He have said he loves ME yet from time to time he mentions how when he meet me I was so skinny. Recently I went to a doctor and got weight lost pills to help me. I told my husband I would like to be at 125-130. He was quick to reply "100!" I tried speaking to him about joining me in the gym and eating more healthy. But he gets upset. He weights 137 and is one of those that can eat fried food all week, have all the pastry desserts and not gain no more than 1 pound a month. Is hard to want to eat a salad when there's a delicious pizza or fully loaded bake potato with steak on the dinning table.

  1. [ deleted account ]3 years ago

    To answer your question, yes, I think it's normal to feel less sexy after childbirth, even if you're back to your pre-pregnancy size.

    Sounds like your husband has some growing up to do. My jaw dropped when I read what you wrote about wanting to get down to 125-130 and he quickly said 100. What nerve!

    If you want to lose weight, it's still ok to eat regular food. If you're only eating salads and starving, you'll always have a short fuse. If you're hungry, have one or two pieces of pizza or a steak and baked potato topped with salt and pepper. Best to cut out deserts, French fries, creamy stuff, soda and candy, though.


  2. Frenia3 years ago

    Im hoping this diet pills helps me. I wish he would've been on board tongive me that motivation.

  3. Suhanisuri3 years ago

    Yes it is normal. After I had my son I went back and forth about how I felt about my body. What really helped me come to terms with my new body was my boyfriend telling me how great I looked. You should discuss with him how you feel and to him that a compliment would go a long way. It's been a year and I am 10 lbs away from my previous pregnancy weight. I found when I focused on eating healthy and not counting calories all the time I lost weight way faster then when I did. Regardless of how you think you look, I'm sure you look amazing!!! Don't focus on a number so much i.e. what you weigh, what size jeans you wear etc. Some never go back to how they look pre pregnancy, some get curves, feel confident in your body an before you know it, you'll feel A LOT better about yourself

  4. Frenia3 years ago

    Thank you. I'm trying to stay focus and be my own motivation.

  5. Torey 3 years ago

    Yes, I agree that your husband should be more supportive!

    It's all about how YOU'RE feelng in your own skin. My husband and I recently started making little changes like cutting out soda, no eating out at fast food places AT ALL. And at home just portioned meals of whatever I make for dinner. We drink nothing but water in my house and try to walk every morning or evening. And that has been a HUGE help and not too much change and stress to drive us insane.

    I have a 2 yr old girl who's a handful, and a 9 yr old with ADHD. And I'm not where I wanna be when it comes to my weight. It's an ongoing battle but the important thing is to feel great in your own skin and don't compare yourself to others. (My common mistake)

    Hang in there!!

  6. Frenia3 years ago

    @ Torey thank you for the positive words. I myself don't drink soda. He in the other hand is the only thing he drinks. I know if I had a partner who was more healthier in life my journey would be easier. Is hard to handle a 3 year old and cook an unhealthy dinner and a healthy meal. Many time I would be tire with life demands to make separate meals everyday.

  7. Teddina3 years ago

    Uh yeah, like 100% less sexy after both kids. And now I'm pregnant and feel about 1000% less sexy :(

  8. Teddina3 years ago

    Also I feel like your husband is kind of a jerk for replaying "100!" - would that even be healthy at your height??

  9. [ deleted account ]3 years ago

    Frenia - There should be no reason for you to have to cook two separate meals. Make a healthy one and if your husband doesn't like it, let him fend for himself!

  10. Frenia3 years ago

    @Teddina actually I won't be. My doctor said for my height ( 5ft) I should be 135. Is so unfair we women go through it all during pregnancy and they don't. And to top it some men expect for us to bounce back in a couple of weeks.

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