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need advice

so I have a 2 year old with a man who I was with a relationship for 6 years we just broke up 3 weeks ago for the reason he was drinking a lot getting violent , he has been messaging me asking if he can take our son for the weekend am I wrong for declining and saying no? I feel so bad I need advice

  1. Shennia510 months ago

    I think it's okay to send your son along with him. After all he is his dad. You cam't keep him away.

  2. [ deleted account ]10 months ago

    Wait, if he's violent?! If there is a history of violence (like police records) you should absolutely contact a lawyer or arbitrator before allowing unsupervised visitation!

  3. Lestie3610 months ago

    Hey! I think it's fine to let him meet his son. You shouldn't worry that much.

  4. Pookie29 months ago

    No! Make him go to rehab, counseling, classes for anger mgmt get him involved in church have church call him get him in activities talk to his friends and coworkers let them know he needs help and uou are trying to save the marriage tell his friends that he should not be drinking

  5. Boone5 months ago

    Don't give her your son. He's probably never going to come back home. He is very irresponsible person. You see it yourself before. It's not going to be alright for you anyway. Juts try to stay away from that man. Also keep your son away from that evil.

  6. Monkey's Mama4 months ago

    If he's violent, I would be worried about the boy being alone with him. Especially if he's drinking at the same time. I think you and him need to sit down and talk about expectations and options as far as visitation goes. Maybe you can all go out sometimes at first, until you are comfortable with it. You can't keep him from his child, obviously, but the transition can be slow.

  7. Boone4 months ago

    Well, this is the bit of your private issue. Still, If you want an opinion then don't let him take the son out. As you mentioned his condition earlier in your post. He is not capable of trust. If he did that to you. Of course which he did then you should not trust him. Just don't give him your son to take for an outing. If he wants then just let him meet his son. That is all for now. If he changes his habits then maybe later.

  8. callisy1 month ago

    Like many of my mom friends, I expected the balanced division of labour in our domestic life to continue after we had children. For some, co-parenting is an equal 50-50 split of both housework and child care. For others, it means one parent is with the kids at all times. But what should it mean for me and my husband? For you and your partner? Many have weighed in on the debate. For instance, a recent study published in the journal Developmental Psychology shows that parents who share caregiving for their preschool children may experience more conflict than in relationships where it’s agreed the mother is in charge. What this study seems to imply is that when mom accepts she will be doing most of the child care and housework, things go smoothly. But when there’s an attempt to divvy things up “equally,” both parents argue. This isn’t to say that we shouldn’t aspire to an equal co-parenting model; it’s just a warning flag that establishing an equal model is hard work.

  9. noreenwawuda1 month ago

    I am sorry for what you are going through. I think your partner has the right to hang with his child. However you must consider your child safety first. You have said that he was a drunkard. Also stated he was violent. Do you think he can the same at the presence of your child? You actually did good to leave him. It is not healthy to raise a child in such an environment. The child might end up emulating the father behavior. That will be so bad. If at all you allow your child to go and see him make sure you consider something’s. Make sure your husband will not drink that day. And if he drinks let him not be violent in front of the child. It would have been more better if the was a second party. Is he seeing another woman? And if he does is the woman responsible enough? Remember it is your child life at stake here. Make sure you take utmost care. You can decide to what you will choose.

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