Why am I struggling so much?

I'm entering my 24th week of pregnancy and I'm really struggling- badly. In so many areas- body image, confidence i can be a mom, comfort in my home (i live with in-laws, got married 1 year ago so still adjusting), hating myself because part of me wasn't ready for this pregnancy and I feel as though I shouldn't feel this way. I'm having a girl and always wanted a girl and most days I feel excited and cant wait to meet her. But all these other issues exist and I'm struggling with it. My husband isn't the most supportive. I don't know if he has his own issues dealing with being at his parents, coming to terms with it all or what. He's really excited for this baby though, i think more than I was. I feel lonely and sad. Sometimes when I'm awake at night or cant sleep or have back pains I feel resentful to him that he isn't awake with me. I told him this several times but he doesn't get it. Worst yet, I'm beginning to feel as though his friends are priority. He's out a lot while I'm at home. I'm frustrated just being home. This isn't my style. I grew up travelling, adventurous, moving around every weekend and now i'm at home feeling stuck in a house i'm uncomfortable in with a baby I love but I'm not sure I know how to raise and with no one to talk to.

  1. Christine Galloway11 months ago

    I went through a similar thing when i was pregnant. It was a complete shock and I was not ready at all. I felt alone and cried many night by myself and felt so guilty for not feeling bonded to my unborn son. I tried to do things to feel bonded but I just couldn't. My son's dad was living a secret life which caused a lot of my stress and he was never around and always mean towards me. I was a first time mom with not much support from him and I felt so much anger towards him. The instant my son was born it gave my life so much meaning. Although it took awhile for his dad to come around he's finally all in and their best of friends, almost inseparable. It took awhile for it to sink in for us and to actually meet him. It'll get better I promise. I had to make some life changing choices to better our lives and now every thing is much better. Don't be afraid to seek help or counseling. I was so determined to hide my feelings and carry on like everything was fine but it helped so much when i finally put my pride aside and asked for help and seeked out a professional who wouldn't judge me and would listen to me and how I was feeling. Got me through my depression and being so hard on myself.

  2. jaimcamp 11 months ago

    I also went through something similar to this. It was a surprise when I got pregnant, I was 20 and turned 21 by the time my son was born. It can all be very overwhelming and myself and my boyfriend and now our son are living at my parents house and it can get very frustrating not having our own space. I'm struggling right now to get my boyfriend to help out more (he's not working right now) so it's very frustrating when he's not doing his share of the load. I found it hard, went back and forth during my pregnancy, worrying about whether I was ready and if I could be the best mom I could be. But trust me, when you get to hold your baby for the first time, you realize that it's just the beginning and it will all work out. Everything gets better. I am now 22 and my son is almost 9 months old. I just focus on me and my son, hoping my boyfriend will come around!

  3. Amy-May 11 months ago

    I went through so many mixed emotions when i was pregnant and from reading your comment it all sounds completely 'normal'. You'll have days where you feel on top of the world and other days you're thrown into a complete panic. Once your little one is here, everything will just fall into place. If you need someone to talk too you're welcome to get in touch (:

  4. Megan Reese Carter11 months ago

    I get the body image issues, so all I can say is that when you look in the mirror try and give yourself a break. You're over halfway through your pregnancy, and just as soon as you've healed from delivering her, you can begin working on getting your body how you want it to be. Even if you hated how you looked before you got pregnant (I did) its never too late to turn yourself into the person you want to be.

    My advice about your confidence in being a mom: do a little bit of research into all the basics of taking care of a baby if you don't have any experience, then do whatever feels right for you. There are a lot of opinions out there about what is best for the baby, but what is best for your daughter is also what is best for you. Don't let anyone judge you on how you feed your baby, or her sleeping arrangements, or anything really, because it is none of their business. Try what you think will work for you and her, and follow what you believe is right, because all you need to do to be a great mother is make sure that she is healthy, happy and well loved, and you get there by taking it one day at a time

    Its ok to be scared about all of it. I was in a very similar situation with my first baby, and it was so hard and so rough. I had to change my life completely this instant I found out I was pregnant while the father didn't really acted like a dad for a long time, well after our son was born and even our second. We got married in a courthouse, shotgun style thanks to the unexpected bun in the oven, and then we spent two years living with my parents and a year with his. My husband and I figured it out he just needed to find his own way of being a father, and it was a hard road to get here, but enough about me.

  5. [ deleted account ]10 months ago

    Dear i had been in the similar situation before i know it is hard sometimes there will be ups and down but god is always with you seeing you, listening to your all the problems.God bless you dear xxxx

  6. luciey9 months ago

    Being a mum is a dream of any lady. This comes with proper and right treatment from the husband. It calls for diligence and wisdom to overcome all that. Remember stress in a family and especially pregnant women can cause a miscarriage. It is always necessary to pamper your pregnancy with happiness and love. Accumulation of stress landed me into problems. I struggled for a better part of my life and I had to go to BioTex clinic for fertility treatment. I learnt a lesson the hard way.

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